


Matters of the Heart

by CSIGurlie07



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: 3x10, Canon Compliant, F/M, Fix It Fic, Legion of Superheros
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-25
Updated: 2018-01-25
Packaged: 2019-03-09 07:29:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13476642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CSIGurlie07/pseuds/CSIGurlie07
Summary: When her meeting with Kara goes sideways, Lena can't bring herself to blame the awkwardness on Kara's supposed flu. Believing Kara to be uncomfortable with her dating James, Lena breaks things off. The true Kara has other plans in mind.See author's note inside for further details.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I have a lot of issues about how Lena's conversation with J'onn-as-Kara was handled in 3x10, and this fic is meant to fix most of them. If they had slowed down, and given a fraction of screentime devoted to the Legion to the actual series regulars, we could have gotten amazing character moments for Kara, Lena, AND James. 
> 
> This is basically what I wish we'd seen in 3x10, and so remains canon-compliant. So yes it means GuardianCorp. I know it's not everyone's cup of tea, but if canon were written this way, would we resent it so much? You be the judge. 
> 
> And even though it's GuardianCorp, there are canon-levels of Lena & Kara interaction, so it's got as much unacknowledged Supercorp as a canon S2 episode.
> 
> Feel free to drop me a note and let me know what you think!

James tried to pretend he wasn't watching the door, waiting for Lena to come back from Kara's. God, he could kick himself for offering the flu as an excuse for Kara's absence. He could have chosen literally anything else: visiting family in Midvale, or a meeting with a potential confidential informant in Metropolis... But no, the flu was the best he could come up with. Now he had to rely on J'onn J'onzz to help put Lena's concerns to rest, without raising the suspicions of the smartest woman in the world.  
  
No pressure.  
  
It wasn't exactly hopeless, he told himself as he took his lunch on the balcony (if only to keep himself from staring into the bullpen). J'onn was psychic-- if he felt himself raising concerns, he could just pile on the Kara-isms, or hell, just play sick convincingly. Still, James’ self assurances fell flat when motion caught his eye, and he saw Lena approaching, looking anything but excited. Rising, James wiped his mouth on a napkin.  
  
"Hey, how'd it go?"  
  
Lena's eyebrows pinched together, her lips twisting into something not quite a smile. "I'm not sure," she admitted. James followed her to the balustrade, leaning on one elbow to face her as she looked out over the city. Her fingers twisted together. "It's strange-- I've never seen Kara sick before."  
  
"Yeah," James agreed, pulling on the only honest answers he could give her. "I've only seen her sick once myself, and when it hits, it hits her hard." He shrugged. "Guess that's the downside of a stellar immune system, huh?"  
  
"It would seem so." Still, Lena avoided his gaze. "It just... didn't sound like the flu. I don't want to accuse her of not being sick,  but-- I don't know..."  
  
_Damn it, J'onn._  
  
"Hey." James gently covered her twisting fingers with one hand. Finally, she turned to face him. "What happened?"  
  
Pale, bare shoulders lifted in a helpless shrug. "She didn't sound like herself. It was awkward. Truly awkward. Somehow, hearing Kara confirm how amazing a kisser you are wasn't quite the girl talk experience I imagined it'd be." 

The sounds of the city washed over them, carried along the gentle breeze. Mostly traffic sounds, the whine of brakes and pulse of traffic passing down below. Then, faintly in the distance, sirens started to wail. James instinctively searched the skyline, though he knew there would be no Supergirl to the rescue this time.  
  
"Maybe it's better this way," Lena continued softly. She too had turned towards the sound of the sirens, spilling sunlight across her features. "To end it now, before it gets messy."  
  
"So, you've made up your mind then."

He didn't bother to pose it as a question. It was as much an observation as anything else, a statement of fact.  
  
Lena nodded solemnly. "I have." Lena pulled away, and James let her go. "I'm sorry, James. Truly."

"I understand," he responded, straightening to his full height and pulling his hands back to his sides. "I can't say I'm not disappointed, but I get it."

"I know this may make things difficult in the office, but I hope we can continue to work well together." She lifted her chin, and with his own eyes James watched her slip effortlessly back into business mode. "I'll be at L-Corp for most of the afternoon today, but I'll be back to catch up on some paperwork later tonight."  
  
James nodded. Working well together wouldn't be an issue-- he'd make sure of that. Still, he didn't quite trust his voice enough to speak. Lena reached up to tuck her long hair behind her ears, and as she did their eyes met. She paused, and for a moment James thought she might say something more. She didn’t.

In the next moment she was gone, leaving James with nothing more than the phantom touch of her hand on his, and the tingle of a one-time kiss.


	2. Chapter 2

When Kara opened her apartment door to James later that night, they didn't say anything. James wordlessly stepped into her apartment, and wrapped her in a tight hug. Kara seemed surprised at first, but relaxed quickly, carefully squeezing him back in equal measure.   
  
"I'm really glad you're okay," he murmured, drawing back to look her in the eye. "You are okay, right?"   
  
Kara nodded, easing the knot of worry that had lived in James’ chest for days. "I'm okay," she promised. "Just a little shaky. Might be another day before I'm back to full strength."   
  
"But well enough for brownies?" James pulled a wrinkled bakery bag from his briefcase. "That new place opened up while you were..."   
  
"Ooh! I am always well enough for brownies," Kara confirmed, reaching for the bag with a delighted grin. She fished one out and took a large bite. "Mmmmm... next time I'm comatose just wave these under my nose, I'll wake up faster."   
  
"Trust me, we tried that," James joked, in spite of himself. Kara moved towards the couch, and James followed, peeling off his coat and bag while she got herself comfortable, munching all the while.   
  
"Oh, Rao these are good. Lena's gonna love these!" At the mention of her best friend, Kara's features somehow brightened even further. "Speaking of, I hear there were some developments while I was out…?"   
  
This time, James' smile was forced as he settled on the couch next to her. "Not anymore. "   
  
"What? What happened?" Kara set her treat aside, turning towards him intently. "I thought J'onn..."   
  
"Apparently, Lena knows you better than J'onn gave her credit for," James informed her, doing his best to soften his tone. He was angry. Not at her, and not Lena, not even really at J'onn. But disappointment tasted bitter on his tongue. "She sensed you weren't yourself, and interpreted it as you not being as okay with us dating as you claimed."   
  
"That's ridiculous! You're my friends, and if you make each other happy, you should be together!" Kara huffed. "I was the one who suggested it in the first place!"   
  
James blinked in surprise. "Really?"   
  
Kara froze, and he could see her debate the value in trying to backtrack. "Only after I noticed the chemistry between you," she explained carefully. "She didn't want to jeopardize your working relationship." She paused. "Was that weird? I didn't mean to make things awkward."   
  
"No, no," James said quickly. "It's fine, I just didn't realize. Though I can't say I ever expected you to by my wingman."   
  
"Well, technically I'm Lena's, but of course you always have my recommendation. You're a great guy, and Lena's a great girl! Why wouldn't I endorse you?"   
  
"Okay, now you sound like a sports sponsorship," James pointed out with a grin, earning a giggle. "But you're right. Lena's great."   
  
Kara's gaze softened. "Yeah, she is," she said thoughtfully. A moment later her gaze sharpened. "I'm glad you changed your mind about her."   
  
Shaking his head, James felt the back of his neck heat with shame at the memory of how strongly he'd argued against Kara's trust in her. That righteous fury had all but disappeared within days of meeting the patient, down-to-earth Luthor, but it wasn't until he saw how torn up she'd been at the thought of having poisoned kids that James had realized just how wrong he'd been.   
  
Now it felt like it had come too late. Maybe, if he'd hated just a little less, he'd have had that much more time with her.   
  
"I'll talk to Lena," Kara promised, taking his hand in hers.   
  
James shook his head. "I'm not sure how much good it'll do. She... I don't know. She didn't want to ask you again because she thinks you’ll just be a more convincing liar. It's like... it’s almost like she was looking for an excuse, and J'onn gave it to her." He shrugged. "If she's getting cold feet, I don't want to push her."   
  
Kara grinned. "Oh, she was definitely trying to find excuses," she promised. "Just not for the reason you think. It's actually kind of a good thing?"   
  
"What? How?"   
  
"It means she thinks she could be happy with you. And with Lena..." Kara sighed, her features turning grim. "Look, James... one you need to understand about Lena is that she's been fighting an uphill battle for a long time. Long enough that it's hard for her to trust when things start going well for her. Instead of enjoying it, she starts wondering when it's going to be taken away from her."   
  
James paused. He'd never considered that from the woman who seemed so stridently confident all the time. But now that Kara had put it to words, James understood where it came from. All this time, he'd only given thought to what the Luthors had taken from Metropolis, and their countless other victims. He never stopped to consider what being a Luthor had taken from Lena.

"That's a tough way to live."    
  
Kara nodded. "Yeah, it is. But here in National City, she's got people to remind her it doesn't have to be that way. Between me and Sam, we can bring her around." She paused then, glancing at the watch on her wrist. "But I should move quickly, before she really digs in her heels." Kara sighed, climbing to her feet. "It’s a lot easier to put her anxiety to rest when I'm not the source of it."   
  
In the time it took James to find his feet, Kara had zipped out and back into sight, now clad in her CatCo uniform of button down and cardigan. The only concession she made to the late hour was a pair of nice blue jeans on the bottom.   
  
She snatched up the remaining brownies. "Mind if I bring these as peace offerings?"   
  
"Please do," James nodded. Climbing to his feet, he collected his things as Kara pulled on her own coat. "And Kara? Thanks."   
  
Kara smiled as she wound her scarf around her neck. "That's what friends are for." 


	3. Chapter 3

Kara found Lena bent over a pile of paperwork in James' office at CatCo. Rather than appropriate James' desk for the endeavor, Lena had squeezed herself in the narrow space between the sofa and the coffee table, sitting on the carpet to lean back against the couch as she worked. The peril of not requisitioning a desk of her own, Kara surmised.  
  
Unable to hide the grin spreading her cheeks, Kara knocked on the open glass door. Lena jumped a little, but melted into a grin when she saw who it was. "Kara! What are you doing here?"   
  
"Apologizing," Kara replied, wagging the bag of brownies she held. "With brownies from that bakery we were waiting to open up."   
  
Lena's eyes glowed brightly in the low light as she sat up straighter, reaching out with grabby hands. "Whatever it is, I always forgive you at brownies."   
  
Kara laughed, handing over the bag as she chucked her purse and settled on the floor next to her. Lena moaned as she took her first bite.   
  
"Oh my god, this is amazing." She handed the bag back to Kara, who fished out her own treat. Holding it gingerly between her fingers, she paused before taking a bite.   
  
"Lena, about what happened--"   
  
"I should be the one to apologize," Lena cut in, swallowing quickly. "I shouldn't have bothered you while you were unwell--"   
  
"I wasn't really feeling myself," Kara covered quickly. "The meds I was on knocked me for a loop..."   
  
"I was just so anxious..."   
  
"I was feeling better but--"   
  
"... it was selfish--"   
  
"--don't even remember most of it."   
  
Their words jumbled on top of each other, speaking over each other in their rush to make things right. They paused at the same time, and promptly broke into laughter. Grinning over their brownies, Lena motioned for Kara to go first.

"Can I get a do over?" Kara asked.  
  
Lena nodded, but it felt reluctant, and Kara waited.   
  
"You don't have to be okay with it," Lena said softly. She tore off a corner of her brownie, studying it intently. "It's fine if it makes you uncomfortable."   
  
"I am okay with it, Lena. More than. I'm really happy for you."   
  
Green eyes glanced at her, dark and uncertain. "Really?" She asked softly.   
  
"Yes, really! You guys are both my friends, and I think you could be really good for each other." Kara let her grin turn devilish. "And after telling you all about my boyfriend troubles last year, I'm looking forward to being the one doing the listening this time."   
  
To her consternation, Lena's features only grew more grim. "And that won't be weird for you? If I complain about him, I'm griping about your friend, who you've known longer than me--"   
  
"Okay, let me stop you right there," Kara cut in, reaching out to cover Lena's wrist with one hand. "Regardless of who I've known longer, James is my friend but you are my _best_ friend. And I am always 100% on your side. I've always been a good sounding board, haven’t I?"   
  
Lena nodded, finally popping the piece of brownie into her mouth.   
  
"That won't change just because James is who you want to talk about. And like you said, we're friends, so my advice will be totally on point."   
  
Lena didn't respond. She only met Kara's gaze again when Kara nudged her.   
  
"You're gonna have to believe me at some point, you know," she said. A flush colored Lena's cheeks, but her smile returned, albeit thinly. "Here I am telling you that I am totally okay with this, so... Unless you're calling me a liar?"   
  
A single dark eyebrow lifted. "Oh, I wouldn't dream of it... Not when you bring brownies."   
  
Kara burst into laughter. Lena managed a few chuckles, but it wasn't long before uncertainty crept back in. Kara watched her break off another piece of her brownie and proceed to stare at it, her gaze suddenly a million miles away. She gave her a minute, then nudged Lena's leg with one knee.   
  
"Hey."   
  
Lena looked at her, apprehension and warmth clashing in an odd progression of expressions across her features.   
  
"Do you like him?"   
  
Green eyes widened at the direct question. Now Kara realized maybe that should have been her angle of attack during her Christmas party. Chemistry can be brushed off, which Lena had, and nudges to act could be resisted, as Lena did. But how Lena felt about him.... evidently, it was much more difficult question to avoid.   
  
"Yeah," Lena admitted softly. "I do."   
  
Lena glanced at her, wary of what reaction her confession would elicit. Kara drew one knee to her chest and rested her chin on it, cartoonishly settling in to await more details. A tiny smile cracked Lena's reticence, and just like that, her decision was made.   
  
"I really like him," Lena informed her, breaking into a genuine grin. "He's smart, and gentle, and a _really_ good kisser."   
  
"I know, right?!" Kara exclaimed, straightening enthusiastically. "How did it happen? Come on, details, woman!"   
  
And out the details poured, and Kara sat in rapt attention as Lena wove her story, starting with the first appearance of Reign and their belief Edge was behind it. Kara was alarmed to hear of yet another assassination attempt, but Lena breezed by it in favor of focusing on the remainder of the night-- namely, the heated kiss between her and James in that very office.   
  
They talked until the brownies were gone and even the last few night owls had left the bullpen. Lena's tale of adventure and romance ended on Christmas, when she and James had watched Supergirl fall.   
  
"Have you heard from her?" Lena asked, almost reverently. "You're the only one who seems to be in regular contact, so--"   
  
"I did actually," Kara covered quickly. "Yeah, when I came out of my drug-induced haze and found out what happened, I tried to call her. She called me back earlier today and said she was fine. Good as new in a few days." Kara hesitated to say more but couldn't help herself. "She said she was going to be with friends tonight."   
  
Lena's smile shone warmly with relief across from her. "Good. I'm glad."   
  
Nodding, Kara leaned back against the foot of the couch, pulling one knee up as she went. She met Lena's gaze. "I missed you."   
  
Lena's gaze misted, smile thinning with muted delight. "I missed you too. I'm sorry it took me so long to find out you were sick. I should have--"   
  
"No, no, it's fine. I promise. I was in no shape to entertain anyone. And besides, I get sick so rarely, I'm usually a pretty awful patient."

It didn't seem to convince Lena, and though she let it go, Kara knew it would take more than J'onn to keep Lena from coming around next time.

They sat comfortably in the silence. Lena had forgotten her work, and Kara had nowhere else she'd rather be. Between Reign, and Mon-el, and Imra, this was the closest she'd felt to normal in a long time.   
  
It was... nice.   
  
"Kara?"   
  
Kara rolled her head around to meet Lena's gaze, only going to the trouble of lifting it when she saw raw unease gazing back at her. "Yeah?"   
  
"I'm--"   
  
Whatever Lena had planned to say tripped on her tongue, returning them to silence until she found another path.   
  
"What if James wakes up one day and remembers I'm a Luthor?"   
  
Lena froze, cheeks flushing as she groaned in mortification. "It sounds so pathetic when I say it out loud,” she moaned. She slumped against the couch, gesturing awkwardly with one hand. “But he’s Superman's best friend, for God's sake! And Clark Kent's too. If either of them thinks for one second that I'm on the wrong side of things, I’m pretty sure who he'll choose to believe, and it won't be me."

She closed her eyes, features crumpling as she gave voice to the fears inside her. Kara struggled to find the words to respond, and in the silence Lena shrugged, running a hand through her hair.

"He won’t choose me,” she repeated. “And I don't know if I can let myself risk letting someone in, just to have it all ripped away. Again."  
  
Jack Spheer flashed across Kara's memory, charming and full of smiles. She remembered the cute grin that had greeted her when she stepped into Lena's office the morning after she and Mon-el crashed their date. The almost giddy tone of her voice when Lena suggested a double date. She remembered the hollow look in Lena's eyes when Jack died.   
  
Lena's lips quivered when Kara took her hand.

"It's been a rough year," she said softly, giving her fingers a gentle squeeze. "For both of us. And I know better than anyone that it can be hard to trust anyone with a heart that's been patched up so many times. But you're stronger than that, Lena, especially when the alternative is living alone for the rest of your life."

Shaking her head, Lena inhaled deeply, clearing her throat of the lump that had grown there. Kara didn't let go of her hand, or look away. She remained right where she was, her fingers wrapped around Lena's.

“You deserve to be happy," she continued, "and James is the most understanding guy you will ever meet. He'll go as fast or as slow as you want. You can trust him in pieces or all at once, and he'll guard it with his life."  
  
Lena wiped her eyes. "Kara..."   
  
"James and I will both respect whatever you choose. But I think I already know what your decision will be."   
  
_"Oh?"_ Lena scoffed, cutting a sharp laugh as she sniffed and reached for a napkin. "And what gave you that incredible insight?"   
  
Kara smiled. "You did. You told me yourself, once. We can't live in fear, right?."   
  
This time Lena’s laugh was throatier, sounding more genuine. She leaned into Kara, wrapping long arms around her waist. Kara curled her arms around Lena's shoulders, pulling her close.   
  
"I don't know what I would do without you, Kara Danvers," Lena murmured into Kara's shoulder.   
  
Kara grinned against the side of Lena’s head. "And here I was about to say the same thing." She sighed contentedly. "I can’t imagine what my life would be like without you in it."   
  
Lena's shoulders tensed, and Kara could almost feel the protests start to bubble up, finding ways to minimize her own importance. But instead of speaking Lena's arms merely tightened around her. They sat like that until Kara had almost dozed off. Blinking drowsily, she let Lena pull her to her feet, and accepted the offer a ride back to her apartment. Once she was in her pajamas, Kara thought to send James a text letting him know how things went…

She fell asleep before she could type a single word.


	4. Chapter 4

The next morning, James got to CatCo early, only to find Lena already there. His arrival caught her eye, and she rose from her seat on the couch, collecting her papers into a single pile on the coffee table.  
  
"Good morning," she greeted softly, reluctant to break the pre-workday quiet. She looked perfect, with nary a hair out of place, while James still felt like the wrong side of whatever the cat dragged in. Spending the night trying to overwhelm his troubles with purpose doing patrols hadn't done him any favors.  
  
"Morning," he returned, easily. "Please tell me you went home at some point..."  
  
"I did," she promised with a laugh. "Slept in my own bed and everything."  
  
James grinned, matching her smile. "Good." He paused, then gathered his courage. "Can we talk, for a second?"  
  
Lena froze, her smile suddenly turning brittle on her face. James wet his lips and tilted his head towards the balcony in silent invitation. After another moment of hesitation, Lena acquiesced, leading the way into the more private space.  
  
When James followed, Lena turned preemptively to speak. "Look, James I think I know what you're going to say..."  
  
"I hope not," he returned, offering a hesitant smile. "Because it took me a long time for me to work up the nerve to say it."  
  
She stared at him, folding her hands together on the stone rail.  
  
"I doubted your intentions when you first came here." The words stabbed him on the way out, and he cursed himself when he saw the barricades come crashing down behind Lena's eyes. "All I knew about you was your name, and that was enough for me to know what kind of person you could be."  
  
"Right," she muttered caustically. "And here I've just proven you right, is that it?"  
  
"No," he replied honestly. "No, it isn't. I judged you, completely without merit. And I judged Kara, for trusting you. I was certain your plan to get your mother arrested was just a cover for your own involvement with Cadmus, and when Lillian framed you for it, I used journalism as an excuse to print that headline because I was so ready to be proven right."

Lena's eyes were muted and sharp in the grey shadows of early morning. The sun had yet to creep fully over the horizon, casting the sky in shades of pinks and purples. The tall buildings of the financial district prevented a glimpse of the sun itself, but already he could sense the uptick in activity as the city started to wake. Lena said nothing, leaving him no choice but to keep pushing through it.  
  
"I was wrong. Again and again I was wrong, and looking back, I am ashamed of those assumptions. I have always prided myself on being open minded, and giving others the benefit of the doubt, but I failed, miserably, when it came to you. And I'm sorry for that. You deserved better."  
  
As he watched, Lena stared at him as though stunned by his admissions. The hard defenses he'd seen sliding into place was now undermined with doubt as she listened, waiting for the other shoe to drop.  
  
"I’m not here to try and change your mind about us," he assured her. "I just wanted you to know that I have nothing but the utmost respect for you: as a CEO, and as a friend. My biggest regret of this past year is that I let my hate keep me from getting to know you sooner."

He should have reached out after the Daxamite invasion. The thought had crossed his mind, but with Kara his only inroad to Lena, and Kara essentially absent for months, he hadn’t been able to bring it up. Now, knowing what he did-- that Lena was as amazing as he’d started to suspect when he’d learned that she’d given Supergirl the only means to activate the irradiation device, and as kind, and thoughtful, and loyal as Kara always said she was-- James wished he’d pushed through Kara’s haze to make a meeting happen.

 _If only, if only, if only..._  
  
He smiled. "You're an amazing woman, Lena Luthor. CatCo is lucky to have you, and so am I-- in whatever capacity you want that to be."  
  
Finished, James gave Lena time to respond if she wanted to. She remained silent, her eyes wide and questioning, features creased with confusion as though trying to puzzle his endgame. Whatever she’d expected him to say, it wasn’t this.

"Okay,” he said finally, realizing no response was coming. He tucked his hands in his pockets. “I just wanted you to know. Thanks for listening."  
  
He turned to go back inside. "James!" Lena called. He stopped and turned back. Her cheeks flushed, and a nervous smile played across her lips. "Would you like to have dinner with me tonight?"  
  
James nodded, doing his best to keep his features neutral even as his heart lifted in hopeful anticipation. He’d meant what he said: he’d taken her aside only to ensure she knew how he felt. He’d expected nothing out of it, but as his heart pounded audibly in his ears, he realized a part of him had hoped…

"Absolutely,” he returned lightly. “Business, or...."  
  
"Pleasure," she specified, her smile deepening into a rakish grin. "Definitely pleasure."  
  
James' heart somersaulted in his chest, elation warring with disbelief. "Count me in." Lena’s features brightened, quickly outshining the anxious energy she’d tried to hide. James jabbed a thumb over his shoulder, gesturing back into the office. “I was going to head to the breakroom for some coffee. Can I get you your usual?"  
  
"That would be lovely. Thank you."  
  
As he left, James heard Lena’s soft exhalation, and the tiny gasp that followed. He grinned all the way to the breakroom. When he handed Lena her mug a few minutes later, their fingers touched, sending sparks of electricity across his skin. When Lena smiled in gratitude, he felt dazzled and amazed, and wholly certain that he was the luckiest guy in the world.

* * *

High above the city, Kara slowed halfway through her dawn patrol when she felt her phone vibrate with an incoming text. Flipping onto her back, she unlocked her screen to read it.

The message contained only three words and an emoticon, and she didn't have to look at the sender to see who it was from.  
  
_No more fear. <3 _  
  
Clutching her phone to her chest in giddy delight, Supergirl grinned, then spun out in wild loop, whooping with excitement.


End file.
